Wednesday, February 3, 2016

So Far

Williamsburg, 2016


So I obviously haven't had much time to check in on what it's like to have three kids, three-and-under.

It's an amazing feeling and yet so intense and humbling and wild. If we were winging it before, now it feels like we need to be strategic and thoughtful about every little moment in the day. Who needs what at this exact minute? And that in itself is exhausting.

When people ask, I say this has been the easiest newborn stage yet. But that comes with a big caveat, in that it's easiest because the older two need so much that Bo's demands seem pretty simple and deliverable in comparison.

New babies need a lot of caregiving, but they don't throw tantrums or Cheerios or sob because they 'don't like Mommy and Daddy.' You don't have to worry about screen time, or practicing letters, or not practicing letters, or whether they are a nice person. Much of a new baby's development takes care of itself (oh look, my hand!), whereas the big guys need a lot of guiding and coaxing and wrangling, plus constant adjustments as new challenges come down the pike.

I think my brain is tired from trying to grapple with it all, which means that at eight weeks into Bo's life, I feel like I'm still not myself.

There's a lot going on and I can't quite see an on ramp back to life as it used to be, where I could finish a sentence or read a New Yorker article from start to finish in less than three months (oh yeah, because life as it used to be has been totally obliterated.)

In a good way, of course. The highs are pretty high too.

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