And the Heat Rolls In...

New York, 2012

Well, we packed a lot into the first weekend of summer (I count Memorial Day, equinox or not.)

A few highlights?

- Friday night we checked out the new roof top bar at the Wythe Hotel, The Ides. It was insanely muggy, but on a cooler night it would be the perfect spot for imbibing with a backdrop of the Manhattan skyline. We could see our new home from the bar as well, which is always fun. Drinks were followed by risotto at home with some friends.

- Saturday was a full day of back to back parties. A birthday brunch in Chelsea and a housewarming in Ditmas Park that stretched 'til late. Will got some practice with baby-soothing care of our friends' 5 month old. Doesn't she look insanely comfortable?

I was also really impressed to see another friend out and about at the party with her 2 week old daughter. So tiny! But she was more than fine sleeping away in a guest room, and I got to feed her. A lot of people give you the impression that you will be on total lockdown with a newborn, and I was happy to see that this doesn't always have to be the case. Her mama (who ahem, gave birth totally naturally) was looking relaxed and supping wine (and they were some of the last to leave.)

- On Sunday, we took a day trip up to Beacon, New York, a small town on the Hudson River. Had lunch at Homespun Foods, ice cream at the Beacon Creamery, and visited the Dia:Beacon. The Richard Serra and Sol Lewitt rooms were incredible, and the space itself is well worth the visit.

- The temperature struck 92 degrees on Monday and we were contemplating a visit to the Red Hook Pool or Fort Tilden Beach. When a friend invited us out on a boat trip, we happily switched gears (the cooler  and towels were already packed!) We started at the World's Fair Marina in Queens, which takes you right by JFK, where you can see the planes take off from about 50 feet away. We cruised up to Douglaston, where the guys and kids had a wonderful time tubing and horsing about in the water. I took it easy, but it was lovely to get out on the water and see New York from a different angle.

We survived intense socializing, searing heat, and toddlers on boats. Let the June and July madness begin!

Happy Long Weekend

Vinalhaven Island, Maine, 2011

We are sticking it out in NYC this weekend for adventures in packing! Hope you are going somewhere wonderful (a taste of our Maine weekends past to inspire you...)

New Harbor, Maine, 2011

North Haven Island, Maine, 2010

South Bristol, Maine, 2010

Christmas Cove, Maine, 2009

Christmas Cove, Maine, 2011

Gear

Cruz Yellow Stroller via Uppa Baby

Our stroller has arrived!

We actually bought this second hand from our new tenant, as she wanted something that would better navigate the stairs, while we are moving into a building with an elevator.

I like the yellow color and I'm quite happy to not have to do all the research myself. It has all the bells and whistles (cup holder, rain canopy, infant insert etc. etc.) Of course, Will's tech obsessions mean he was pretty enthused about the Origami, but it seemed like overkill to me (from both a price and a size p.o.v.) Running lights? Not sure that's totally a requirement.

29 Weeks

29 weeks, 1 day

29 Weeks! The latest?

I have gained 10 pounds. I am mostly fine with this, and fine with my body changing, until I see an unflattering photo, and then I am enormously crabby. A friend and I always joke that we suffer from positive body dysmorphia, meaning that 99% of the time we think we look utterly gorgeous, and then are puzzled and set adrift when the zipper does not zip or the reflection in a window suggests anything otherwise.

Word to the wise. Do not send a pregnant lady a photo of herself (or tag her in said photo on Facebook) unless you are absolutely, 150% sure that you have never seen her look better.

We have taken to calling the hospital where I will have the baby "the Victorian insane asylum." I realize this is not very yogi-like and I have probably just had my membership in the sacred circle of earthy Brooklyn mamas revoked. But so be it. Gallows humor seems to be getting us through the day. Namaste.

I read a story of an amazing, awe-inspiring, well lit natural childbirth in a bathtub, and felt a bit like I was trying to decipher ancient hieroglyphics. I am certain that this is possible. I am just vaguely aware that this may not be my experience. And that that's okay too.

11 weeks to go, and the baby seems to be rearing to go. You sometimes hear people liken a baby moving to various forms of marshal arts. To me, it feels like he is rattling his cage, starting to get ready for the world.

So that's our news...it's been muggy and damp and rainy all week in New York, but it's better than oppressive heat, I suppose. I can't believe that next week will mark 30 weeks and that this mole-like new creature is almost here with us. I've been reading Anne Enright's Making Babies, which is hilarious and spot on in so many ways. And I skipped over 28 weeks, because, well, I just felt like it.

27 Weeks

26 Weeks

25 Weeks

24 Weeks

23 Weeks

22 Weeks

20 & 21 Weeks

19 Weeks

18 Weeks

17 Weeks

16 Weeks

15 Weeks

14 Weeks

Preparations

Home

So we had a sort of tragicomic visit to our hospital last night to tour the labor and delivery unit. For some reason I had imagined that the tour would be really reassuring. You know: a cute nursery jam-packed with peach-fuzzy newborns and those "It's a Boy!" balloons everywhere. Orderly lists of things to pack and so on.

Instead, well, we got off on the wrong foot, somehow.

Will got stuck on the subway, and so was late. So I was there frantically texting him and worried that somehow he wouldn't be able to get into labor and delivery once the tour had begun. So I guess I was on edge and not in my most zen state going into it.

Then, as soon as the doors to the unit opened, we were met by a woman in labor (behind closed doors, but even so) screaming bloody murder. I mean, it sounded like a horror film. This was not the kind of intense moaning I've heard before on TLC or in the Business of Being Born. This was really unsettling.

The nurse who was leading the tour said something like "That's what natural childbirth sounds like," and seemed mostly unfazed. But at one point even she remarked that she hadn't heard anyone scream like that when a tour was happening. "We have an 80% epidural rate here," she explained. So between the tardy husband and the screaming, by the time we got to the C-section recovery area, I was really really rattled. I think I just don't especially like hospitals to begin with and so the whole thing felt very alien.

I guess I am feeling extremely unprepared for labor. I'm hoping that my childbirth class, which starts in a few weeks, will do a bit to assuage some of my worries, but, well, yikes. It's going to take a while to get that screaming out of my brain.

Gear (and Girls)

Kate Quinn Organics

I am doing my best to stay disciplined about buying things for baby, given that my employment status remains uncertain. But sometimes resistance is futile.

I popped into Area Kids this morning for some strict window shopping, and left with these two very cute numbers from Kate Quinn Organics. Eh, baby needs to be clothed, right? I know that 7-9 pounds is not very large (about the size of our small grey cat, as a matter of fact), but these 0-3 month things still seem unfathomably small. I was joking to Will that it's so weird to think that our little baby boy will at some point be a 180+ pound man. It just seems so implausible.

Anyway, lots of things in a holding pattern for us these days. Move date uncertain, job status uncertain. It's left me irritated these last few weeks, which is part of the reason I haven't been posting much. No one wants to hear my grumpy musings. Anyway, that grumpiness is gradually shifting to bemused shrugging. Clearly, so much in life is beyond my control. I am trying to be Buddha-like about it all.

The odd thing is that, after meeting approximately one million people at this magazine, I have had complete radio silence from them for two weeks. I know that this could mean any number of things. They could be interviewing other people, working out budgets, or, well, just not that into me. Which is fine. But so far my very polite follow up emails have gone unanswered and I am starting to feel a little adrift. Would it be so hard to send me a "Sorry, kiddo?" email? It's quite mysterious and obviously I am not getting any less pregnant as the days pass.

Things were going so well I had just about wrapped my head around the idea of being a working mom. I was dutifully researching pumping at work and nannies and so on. But if there's anything pregnancy has taught me it's that as soon as you get used to an idea, you are onto the next challenge. So I am adapting and working on picturing being at home with baby for awhile.

Last night, Will and I caught up on the last 3 or 4 episodes of Girls, and it really resonated. It reminds me so much of being 23 or 24 in the city. People have blasted the characters and called them narcissistic and pretentious and homogenous, but, well, that pretty much describes me and my roommates circa 2004.

I can most definitely relate to the feeling of being in New York, on the cusp of all of these big things, screwing things up along the way, sometimes getting it right.

Us, Williamsburg, 2004

Williamsburg, 2004

Maine, 2004

And yeah, at 33 and a mother to be, I guess my life these days looks a lot more together than it did back then. But I still feel a lot like that opinionated, ambitious, idealistic, cocky, hedonistic 20-something.

And so a lot of the scenes in Girls just make me laugh. Like the one where Lena Dunham, who I am obsessed with, goes for a job interview and makes a date rape joke, thinking she and the interviewer are on the same wavelength.

When I was first in New York and interviewing for jobs, I'd often tell people the truth, that in 5 years I didn't want to be doing anything that resembled the job on offer; that I wanted to be a travel writer.

Which leads me to wonder...was it something I said?

The Conversation

via The Conversation

Okay, so I haven't been completely inert.

I know I am late to the party but I've really been enjoying The Conversation, with Amanda de Cadenet. First of all, I would like Amanda to come over for tea and a chat. She's just the right mix of new age-y and no bullshit for my liking.

You can watch her interviews on topics like motherhood, sex, finances, and more online, and the her website has some pretty thoughtful posts (like this one, this one, and this one) as well.

Perfect rainy day fodder.