Tuesday, June 12, 2012

A Day in the Life

Williamsburg, 2012

Will came home last night, tired from work, and I was cranky cranky cranky. And restless. And exhausted.

It's hard to describe to him what my day is like other than to say ''I've been gestating our baby." And fretting about getting organized at home. And bored silly. And becoming increasingly uncomfortable throughout the day. By 7 or 8 p.m. I am kind of physically spent, and at the same time really craving social interaction. And often I find myself getting irritable and disappointed when he is, by contrast, in wind down mode after a day at the coal mines, as we like to call it.

Although my husband is more than lovely and has been great about making dinner when I can't muster the energy, I think there's a limit to how much pregnancy chatter he can sustain after going out and hunting for our dinner all day, figuratively speaking.

I don't mean to sound like a desperate housewife or anything. I wouldn't say that we've got a Mad Men kind of dynamic going on. I've been a freelancer for years and am generally used to entertaining myself throughout the day, getting out of the house, reading the paper, walking, and so on. Pregnancy just adds a whole new layer to it and I'm realizing more and more that I need to be aggressive about reaching out to other women in the same boat.

I think it will be especially key when the baby is here and he turns out to be a terrible conversationist. You just can't be alone in your own head (and increasingly creaky body) all day and then try to pack in all your need for social connection into the last hour of energy you have left. It seems to be a recipe for disaster.

My friends are absolutely great but 99% of them have full time jobs and so are only available when I have the least amount of stamina to see them. Or, I have a whirlwind weekend of non-stop entertaining and seeing people followed by a week of isolation. It seems to be feast or famine.

So have been trying to shake off my normally curmudgeonly, "I have enough friends" tendencies and be more proactive about making new connections with other women who may be able to relate and are also at home during the week.

It feels like the first day of school in some ways, but, hey, I survived that...

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